Join me, why don't you, to roll joyously around in the muck that is Big Brother?So, Ziggy, the new housemate, was introduced to the show last night. I just read his profile. He wants to work for Hugh Hefner and is also a banker. He is "up for romance" in the house.
The man's introduction to a houseful of women (who are mostly slightly insane, which is not a bad thing) was interesting to watch. He loves himself. And the women (on the whole) love themselves very much indeed... so will there be room for love to – manifest – in a houseful of self-love? Ugh, actually. Ugh.
Personally, I like Laura (left) a lot, so far. She is down to earth and was bothered when Lesley (the Women's Institute member and ex Cambridge don) sat alone outside. Laura said she was worried for Lesley as she was being so solitary. Most of the others didn't seem to even notice or care about Lesley. Bitchy Charley "a self-proclaimed it-girl" *vomit* has already picked Lesley out to be house underdog.
Carole is a good sort. She has taken on a matriarchal role (what a surprise) and is surprisingly game. She is old enough to have developed confidence that will win her friends in a houseful of insecure wannabes whose only real ambition is to appear on the front of Nuts, Zoo and possibly the adverts for Television X.Most of the others don't do anything for me, but maybe that's because I'm not a 14-year-old boy (or 24-year-old man) who has got his willie out to watch the girls (two of whom are twins who describe themselves as 'twintastic') and prance – yes, really, prance – around in very little pink outfits. They are like lobotomised deer.
The twins are not only vacuous and dull but they are not as good looking as they reckon they are. Goodness, all that endless modelly posing in their bikinis... But I don't suppose the lads' mags will focus too much on their faces. And they can always be airbrushed.
As for Davina, well. Well, well, well. Not much changes, does it? The same tired repertoire. The same easy interviews (to come)...
Oh dear. What was that? The summer slipping by... Noooooooooooooooo!
Hey Mell D, Has just gone 11 AM, & I am in bitching mode, an atrocious waste of energy, am glad you know their names. Yes, the twins are not beautiful, they are pretty wee things who confuse beauty with wearing short dresses. They are so child-like, it is creepy. If they were non-twins, you wouldn't look twice at them.
ReplyDeleteShaban is awful, no social skills, doesn't listen to anyone but herself, quite sad to watch.
Yes, I agree Laura is showing empathy, and although I am not fond of Lesley, I hated to see her pretty much ignored when they were all coming in, she was simply invisible because she isn't 20 & didn't have her gussett (sp?) showing.
Tracy, I think possibly used to be a man, and is not as interesting as channel 4 would like to think, but I hope she is not sidelined too. She is sweet but this faux eccentricity is too 80s for me.
Laura seems lovely just now but I bet there is a catty side.
I think the twins will piss everyone off soon soon soon.
dear mellifluous - oh no, just as I had decided I'd like to come and spend a bit of time over here. Not BB! Everyone says how much they hate it and then gets sucked in. Me too - until now. I am not switching on and if anyone mentions it I will stick my fingers in my ears and go la la la.
ReplyDeleteNMJ, hello there... Yes those twins are creepy. They are like inflatable Chucky dolls. The sooner they go, very much the better.
ReplyDeletePoor Lesley – you are right, if she got her gusset out she'd be right in with the likes of the tartlets whose sole aim in life seems to be to share their gynaecological doings with everyone (bet ya).
Totally with you on what you say, esp re Shaban and Tracy. I feel like it's 1984 again when I see Tracy. I can hear Frankie Goes to Hollywood in my head and remember my (ahem) pink neon fingerless gloves.
Dear Signs - come back, come back! Join in... Come on! You KNOW you want to.
ReplyDeleteDo it in the name of – erm – popular 'culture'. My excuse is that I need to be up on current affairs (however unimportant) as a journalist.
You can comment about other stuff, though. We won't mind. I vow, pledge and promise that my posts will not become BB posts solely. If they did/do, my next stop will be somewhere with padded walls.
Hey Signs, you must come back! Mell D has rabbits, she is lovely, she writes interesting stuff, she is just indulging our love/hate thing with BB.
ReplyDeleteSorry, Mell D, panicked there for a bit.
x
Thanks, lovely NMJ. Let's hope Signs will return...
ReplyDeleteThat is true – I am only providing a place – an illicit shadowy candle-lit room for us – in which we can meet and talk where certain ears cannot hear us.
x
Oh, now this is strange. I have just replied to you at mine, saying I was about to call you Mel D but wouldn't because it sounded like the Spice Girls - and here I find that nmj is already doing it.
ReplyDeleteI quite understand the thing about having one's finger on the pulse with you being a journalist and all. But still - la la la and down with Big Brother. Ar, that felt good.
Ah, Signs. What are you like? You do know that between NMJ and The Periodic One, you'll come round. There's a chair in our lair, just for you...
ReplyDeleteWow. NMJ - you are dangerous when you turn bad. What an acid-tongued viper. Go you. I am immoderately excited by this development. Do it again. (Incidentally, I think MD answered your mango jam query downstairs - very effectively, too)
ReplyDeleteReading The Signs - as you know, I've had my doubts about you for some time now, and so I can't really feign surprise at your presence here in this murky hellhole of a swamp. You are a secret fan of lowbrow pursuits, maybe? Well, you've come to the right place - Mellifluous Dark keeps a wretchedly diseased house.
Mellfluous Dark - lovely to be here again in your attractive and gleaming blog. You are too prolific as a blogger and I am already trailing behind badly (can't believe I had to rely on a mere girl to answer NMJ's jam query for me)
Right. I'm actually watching BB right now. Only I'm not, because it's last night's programme. What's going on? Am I suffering for being in Ireland? Or is it the same in Britain - no show on a Saturday? An absolute disgrace, anyway. I'm actually having to talk with my girlfriend. Can you imagine? Crazy.
Or at least I would be, if I hadn't decided to write to you. Phew.
By the way, I share your disgust of inconsiderate drivers. If they only ran the risk of harming themselves - no problem. But they don't. They put everyone unfortunate enough to come near them on the roads at risk, too. They are bastards and I despair of them.
Yes. The Twins. I'm still trying to be positive and give everyone a chance, so I'm not too keen to comment on them, yet. They are gruesome. They are more than gruesome, in fact, they are double gruesome. Can you imagine the despondency of the parents knowing that there are two of them? What are the freaking chances?
They are just wrong. Wrong to think of themselves as cute, wrong to behave like seven year olds and wrong, quite possibly, to exist. I cannot for the life of me imagine how it would be possible to live with them. Well, I can, but it involves a high velocity rifle and a fervent desire for temporary immunity from prosecution.
Apart from that, they're grrrreat.
And where has Russell Brand gone?
Okay, I need to go and watch these people more closely, but I just wanted to drop in and say hello.
I'll go and see what, if anything, I have failed to respond to elsewhere and try to catch up. I may just have to haul my answers upstairs - following the BB trail you leave in your disgraceful wake.
Night NMJ, Night Signs, Night Mellifluous, Night John Boy.....
x
Oh my God. Signs came back whilst I doodled to you, Melliflouous Dark.
ReplyDeleteSigns - hello. Give in to your needs, embrace BB, embrace the dark side, embrace your murky destiny. You know you want to (as MD correctly pointed out).
Mellifluous Dark - I forgot to say. Your excuse about needing to have your journalistic finger on the pulse of popular culture is a very fine excuse indeed.
It is bollocks, if you don't mind my saying so, but it made me swoon with admiration that you would stoop so low as to pull this old chestnut out of the bag.
You are a disgrace. Well done. I admire you deeply now.
Kind regards to everyone..........x
TPE, good evening to you. I hope the falling of the night finds you well and that you are comfortable in my attractive bloghouse of disease and low-brow wretchedness where we write of things that we can’t say out loud. Do take a seat and take off that hat.
ReplyDeleteMango jam. Yes. You owe me one, Englishoid. Yep. As I say, do try guava. Very nice. And I think Tesco and Sainsbury’s sell it.
I am not watching BB right now, even though I have E4 and could. This makes me superior to you, TPE. But you already know that. Instead, here I am, at the machine, sparks flying off the keyboard while I neck my Badoit.
Now, TPE, don’t try too hard to be nice to the twins. They don’t really deserve any pity or lenience – they are (almost) grown women you know. I can only imagine that the parents shoved the pair of them towards Topshop, gave them a pony to buy skimpy gear plus the cab fare to the BB auditions.
I wish I knew where Russky Brandiovski has gone. He was as mad as a parrot’s foot and made it all worthwhile last year.
Regarding the mad-bad drivers thing… At such times I wish those ‘drivers’ would just automatically disappear in a small puff of smoke to leave others to get on with it in relative safety… One of the people involved (who survived) has lost one of his legs. I wonder what caused the accident. If the lorry driver had a heart attack or passed out at the wheel, well, obviously it's just tragic. But if it was negligence, isn't that manslaughter at least?
Anyway, TPE, I shall leave you thrashing for sanity in the pit that is BB. Good luck. If the twins appear on screen, look away. Put cream on your feet or something. They will sap your synapses in a medusa-like manner.
Goodnight my friends,
x
TPE, of course it's bollocks. I'm a hack (sometimes), what the heck exactly do you expect from me?
ReplyDeleteEh?
Eh?!
Yours disgracefully etc...
Ah, I really don't know if we'll get Signs to join us, she's just too classy. . . . Guava jam, I will try it. Pony Boy, me - viperous? Not really. Just telling the truth. But I see it turns you on, so I will be viperish (that is an adjective too, did you know?) again soon... I saw BB was not on tonight and I was disappointed, how bloody sad is that. And I don't have E4, so I will have to wait til tomorrow. Russel Brand, has he not gone to USA? And he has been replaced by hugely UNTALENTED Chris Moyles. Okay, night, everyone x
ReplyDeleteWe are all classy in our own way. NMJ. You sound very classy. So does that Hooves Person. And me, well, of course I am classy. So, Signs needs to get with the programme and join us. It's just a matter of time, you watch.
ReplyDeleteI cannot warm to Chris Moyles. I just about know who he is. And that is sufficient.
PS: It's very warm again (was when I got up at seven). Has June hit yet, lovely NMJ?
I'm watching you all, don't think I'm not! But I'm looking at it this way, ms finger-on-the-pulse: you watch BB, so I don't have to. I can just slip down to the murky depths every now and then and listen to you, nmj and the wild horseman. Because I am, truly, a very classy dame. Ask anyone.
ReplyDeleteBut Signs, Signs, Signs, Signs, Signs. Where am I now? Eh? Not watching now, am I? And did I watch it tonight? Eh?
ReplyDeleteHa!
(Must admit, I did watch the crappy Davina chatting to psychiatrists show over the weekend but that doesn't count).
You'll see – you'll end up watching it more than NMJ, Lord Pony and myself.
Lord Pony? Now you're talking, honey. This sounds like exactly the sort of title I deserve (according to some recent findings in my wildest dreams).
ReplyDeleteHow are you today, Mellifluous One? I'm going to try guava jam just as soon as I can find it. That really sounds as if it might be rather lovely - nice one for the recommendation, Mrs Muck, thank you.
Right, where were we?
NMJ - yes. Be Viperish (excellent word, btw). I need this of you. It is just all so unlikely when you go hyper-viper, that I am left winded by fiercest desire.
What do you mean that Signs is too classy to come here? Me and Mellifluous Dark are here, and we're both extremely classy people (except for her). Plus, I see that Signs has, in fact, been back already. I just knew that she was morally corrupt.
Chris Moyles is dull. It is a lot to expect that he should be able to follow in the disgracefully talented footsteps of El Brandoid, and he has merely proved this fact with turgid aplomb. What an utter dobber. Honest to goodness, even Mellifluous Dark could have done a better job.
I don't think it's sad that you were disappointed that BB wasn't on - I think it is charming, noble, necessary and, truth to tell, exciting (again).
But listen, you are far too decent a person to get wrapped up in this mess - get out while you still can, NMJ, it's not too late. Run, sweety, run - head to the mountains and wait for me. (I'll be with you in approx 10 - 12 weeks) x
Mellifluous Dark - sorry about all that. People like NMJ tend to hang about these rougher, earthier posts, getting their fix of filth and leering lewdly from the sidelines as the intellectuals (that would be you, me and Signs) try to honestly debate some difficult issues. It's quite sad to see, really.
Bollocks - I've got someone approaching the house in a car ( a car! a car! modernity in the mountains! potential sex!)
I'm just going to post this now and get straight back to you. Sorry about that, Magnificent Hostess, with you as soon as I've slept with, or chased off, the interloper.
(3 minutes max either way)
Okay, apologies. Back now, Mellifluous Dark (Did you miss me? Did you? Did you?)
ReplyDeleteIs that right what NMJ said about Brandiovski heading to the USA? That's a bit depressing. Like Ant and Dec, the man is a natural. A leader, a legend - and doubtless fairly good at kissing, too.
I think he maybe kisses a bit like a wild animal, though, whereas Ant and Dec are probably quite gentle with each other. Mmm. Yes, really quite tender, I imagine. I think there's room for both styles, however. Just sort of depends on the mood.
You'd want your Brand style kissing if you were naked at a carnival and roaring like a tiger whilst properly high on a concoction of Grade A drugs.
And then a more sort of Ant and Deccy type approach would seem appropriate following a nice meal with the boys in a moonlit chalet up a mountain in Switzerland.
Just a thought, really.
The Davina psycho-boffin show was limp as hell, wasn't it? She just seems to have entirely lost her spark - as if she simply can't be bothered. V disappointing, all things considered.
I used to love the boffin show, as well. It's brilliant seeing the Housemates picked apart by morally deviant psychobabblers who've sold their souls for a chance to be on the telly. Who does that? How can we take their findings seriously?
I take their findings v. seriously, indeed. If you take what they say at face value and just decide to accept it as entirely valid analysis then, almost unbelievably, it becomes possible to loathe the Housemates even more. This is A Very Good Thing, as far as I have ever been able to tell, and I actually really still love the boffins and their boffiny show, if we have to be honest about stuff here (just keep a wee bit quiet about it, okay?)
You're right, no-one can warm to Chris Moyles. He is painfully unfunny and crass. I don't mind crassness, but it really needs to be backed up with exceptional wit and a rapier sharp inventiveness. He is singularly lacking in both qualities.
I have to squint at the TV to make sure he's actually there, because his blandness makes him swim out of focus. He simply cannot hold my attention.
Signs is a classy dame, it's true. And I know this is true for a fact, because I was the one who first said it of her a few months back. I regret it bitterly, of course, but can't be seen to go against my own magnificent judgment by declaring so publicly - you understand, I hope?
Why would the twins need a cab fare if they were given a pony? Would they not just use that to get to the shops?
What else? Yes, you were momentarily superior to me for not watching BB whilst I crawled through the dirt with my mouth open, shouting rude words at slow people on the box. Get over yourself. You'll be joining me down there often enough. Bring popcorn.
I think it could (and should) be classed as manslaughter if a driver is found to have been negligent in a fatal accident. I have zero tolerance, for example, of people who talk on their phones whilst driving. ZERO tolerance.
Even if they don't cause accidents, I want them dragged from their cars and whipped publicly by a baying mob of the recently bereaved, armed with knotted ropes.
Okay, maybe not. But it pisses me off so very, very much that people can behave in such a selfish and stupid manner.
I better stop. I was going to get on to drunk drivers, but I might just explode if I do so.
Lovely to see you, Imelda, and congratulations on writing your 100th post. You are most engagingly excellent, yes indeedly, and I look forward to reading whatever else spills out of your warped mind in the future.
Kind regards to you, and to NMJ and the majestic Signs, too.
x
(sorry for going on like a spazzoid)
Sorry, I forgot to say - Charley (sp?) is my new least favourite inmate. Please tell me she has at least one redeeming feature, but I am buggered if I can find it. She is just horrible.
ReplyDeleteLord Pony,
ReplyDeleteCan I just very quickly say hello and extend my greetings to you. I will not have sufficient time to respond to your latest marvellous posts but wanted to touch base so as you know I am not being rude.
I will however,answer your last post re Charley. She is absolutely horrible. Oh, and apparently one of the House People has said that they are going to introduce everyone to a new form of music: indie. Can you effing believe that? Ha!! We are of the wrong generation to be watching this mountain of cochones, Lord Ponetta. They think they have discovered Indie music. Heavens.
Thank you for persisting with the blog and for getting through the 100 mark with me. I must say, I get rather a great deal of pleasure writing all this warped information down. It's gratifying that lovely NMJ and classy Signs are all caught up in this web of madness.
Be assured of my future attention. I will be back, one and all.
HM Mellifluous Dark
x
hey all, just dipping in to say how much i hate them all except ziggy - tonight was the first full show i've watched & i am speechless with the horror of it all.
ReplyDeletebtw, pony-almost-husband-maybe, you better not be sleeping with interlopers, let that be a warning to you, laddie!
jeez, i need to sleep now - i am turning into mell d, never sleeping properly, except i can't do the lovely kung fu as treatment, i'll do my gentle made up yoga instead.
i need to go see the inuit thing on newsnight, my stepdad being from greenland, my ears prick up when it's mentioned.
x
Wish I could join you doing your lovely yoga. I'm crap at kung fu. See latest post. Having a night where I just feel crap about everything.
ReplyDeleteZiggy is the only decent one in there, tis true.
Sleep well NMJ, I'm off there myself, soon...
x
Oh heavens, I shouldn't worry overly about responding to my messy gibberish, Your Majesty. I already know you're not the rude type of blogger, that's one of the reasons I like it here so much. You'll just tire yourself and start to feel like you're getting swamped if you feel you have to respond to every single thing I ever splurge on your page.
ReplyDeleteI get tired just thinking about what I'm coming out with, so I simply dread to think how it affects other people. Relax, I know you're one of the good guys.
My latest least favourite person, incidentally - and I'm really having trouble remembering their names, so I hope I get this right - is the one who looks a bit like Kylie Minogue's sister.
So I tried with the name thing and failed - get over it. Do you know the one I mean, though? She is startling in her gruesome self-involvedness. There is just something terribly unpleasant about her, to the extent that she actually makes me feel slightly uneasy. She has temporarily knocked Charley from the sacred spot of Least Favourite, Most Loathed.
Ha! The arrogance of youth, Imelda. I heard the thing about indie music being new - this was said near the beginning of the show, I think - and it just made me laugh, I'm afraid. The only consolation when you consider people this young, is the fact that they will grow up one day and reach a more agreeable age and stage in their development.
This level of (swaggering) ignorance is shattering to behold. Really quite something.
NMJ - now you tell me that I can't sleep with interlopers? But what if my visitor today had been Emily Watson? You surely wouldn't deny me the life-affirming pleasure of sleeping with revered Emily? That's just mean, that is.
Was the Inuit thing good? I'm glad to see you're still trying to cleanse yourself following a goggle-eyed gawp at BB. You may just be the only one of us here to get through this sorry mess with your reputation intact. x
Mellifluous Dark - sleep well, and thanks for taking the time to say hello.
With kind regards and in full appreciation,
Lord Ponetta
(yummy - this name got me feeling properly magnificent)
i think Shabnam used to be man too.
ReplyDeleteShe sure as heck looks like one...
ReplyDeleteLord Pony, did you try the guava jam, eh? What is your verdict. [Can I point out that I have had to resort to writing a reply on Word just in case I lose my short reply to your short comments? Anyway, be grateful.
ReplyDeleteI’m not sure what you mean by calling my posts ‘rougher’ and ‘earthier’. Are those good things? Or are you (again) alluding to a lack of sanity and sophistication on my part?
I think you need to explain who – or what – was in that car that rolled up. And, is it really the case that cars are so rare in your neck of the woods? I imagine you to live in a Little House on the Prairie set-up now. Is this correct? Do you have a sister called Mary and sleep with a bonnet on your head? Well? (I used to cry at LHOTP. Such a sentimental child.)
It’s very disappointing that Russel Brandiovski has gone Stateside. He was ours. How very dare he? I cannot be doing with Chris Moyles. Really. Plus he is on past my bedtime. I agree that the kissing styles of Brandiovski and AntandDec would differ. AntandDec is an altogether more gentle animal, a little dormouse, compared to Brand’s wolf, don’t you think?
The BB Boffin show is generally good. When it is sans Davina. How did she manage to balls that one up? She did, didn’t she? She seemed so unprepared and didn’t follow the boffs’ insights up very well, I thought.
(Pony is slang for £25. But let that not reflect on your self-value, dear Lordy…)
I watched The Programme last night, as you will see from my latest post. What a palaver eh? I really do think they need to have a limit of two under-20s , two under-25s and the rest should have a greater age. Remember BB1? There were no teenagers in it and I think that’s why it was better (apart from its originality aspect). I don’t want to watch teenage wannabes. People of Ziggy’s age and brain size – as a minima – would be best. At least arguments have a semblance of sense and grounding.
That Danni Minogue woman is Shabnam. I cannot bear her either. What is she going on about: “I’m just here for the exposure. I’ll get what I want when I get out.” What? A slap?
And, drunk drivers/ bad drivers… well, we are definitely agreed on that point, Lordly One. When I was five, my friend, Joanne, was knocked over and killed by a car. I have vague memories of People Not Talking About It and wondering were she had gone. Years later, I heard it was a speeding driver who had killed her. Her family moved away and her parents soon divorced, blaming one another for letting her play outside.
S and I almost were both knocked over as we crossed a road yesterday – a car came screeching round a corner. What a fucking wanker. I also HATE cyclists who fail to stop at red lights and who are allowed to ride around uninsured. What the hell is that all about?? I have been known to shout the ‘c’ word at riders who almost hit me/others as they treat the road as their own and whiz by on crossings. Absolute bastards.
Anyway, Lord Ponetta, I have written more than 500 words and have 2,000 more to write for work now. Thanks for your regal and appreciated comments re my blog. I must say, I relish reading your responses and those of the lovely Clanger, Signs et al rather lots.
Best wishes from the capital city of England to you all,
x
What a disgraceful pleasure it is to read such a response, Mellifluous Dark. I mean, honest to Emily Watson, it just makes me feel happy. It is so rare to find bloggers who take care of their guests in this manner. Obviously, I am the supreme master at this (when I finally get round to responding to my poor and weary guests, of course, or, indeed, let them into my house at all) but you are sooooo good it makes me nervous for my tattered crown.
ReplyDeleteIt is amazing how people seem to find this so hard to do. And here’s you – knackered and frequently disoriented, a little bit blue (I read this in a response you gave to someone, I think), busy as a demon - still managing to show how it is possible to do things politely and with effortless style.
I must just say again – Anna MR is almost deviantly friendly and chatty, too. (I’ll make sure to drag her along here sometime real soon) I think it would maybe look a little bit like a train wreck, however, if you two ever hooked up – so you might want to bear that in mind. And you know already that Signs is a blethery, yet classy, dame.
Right, that’s all the loving praise and adulation you’ll get out of me for a very long while, Mellifluous Dark, but I would like you to know that for once I’m being perfectly serious, okay? I think you are outstanding.
And because I have already written (roughly) 54,613 words, without even starting to respond to your response to my response to your response to my response to your post – or something – I am going to go for a new and cool and super slim-line approach and see if this might help us escape the habit of writing books to each other. Okay….
1) Guava jam. Not yet, Mellifluous, but then I haven’t been to a shop, any shop, for quite some time. The nearest “big” shop is about seven miles away, and I only go when my girlfriend absolutely insists. Because of this truculence of mine, she rarely does requests - unless they seem to make a kind of sense. I’m not sure that if I suddenly announce an interest in guava jam she would necessarily be made to feel calm. I remain hopeful, however, that Tesco will shortly be bulldozing some of the poorer farmers in the immediate area clean out of their land and homes – because every little helps. I don’t think she’ll mind being sent to get me guava jam when Tesco is only 100 yards or so away. It’s the dream, certainly.
2) Point Number One was way too long. I need to get a grip here.
3) Rougher/earthier posts. Purely a reference to your BB fare and the necessarily murky-dirty contents, therein. Yes, the earthy and rough stuff is good, in a dirtily wrong kind of a way. Mainly I was just trying to make out that NMJ was bad and mucky to be hanging out in such a place. Because I just wanted to, okay?
4) The interloper in the car. So distressingly boring that I can’t even bring myself to deal with it. My hopes were cruelly raised over nothing, Imelda. No frighteningly random afternoon sex with strangers. No Emily. No nothing. Just a guy in a car with a shitey sense of direction.
5) Apart from the farmer who lives along the way, and whose horses, incidentally, are in my garden cutting the grass, there will maybe only be about two or three cars passing on any given day. Sometimes less. This is how I like it, because I’m not a great fan of company (girlfriend and dog, excepted – and you, Emily, if you’re reading this).
6) Little House on the Prairie. Yes. That is precisely the sort of set up I’ve got going, right down to the clothes I wear – esp. the bonnet I wear whilst sleeping. In fact, I wear the bonnet pretty much all the time. It is a lovely bonnet. (Who did you used to fancy, btw, from the little house up the hill? And whatever did you find to cry about?)
7) AntandDec v Brandiovski. Is it at all possible that we are actually in full agreement over something? Brand = wolfy kiss; AntnDec = dormousey kiss. Word.
8) Chris Moyles. Does anyone like him, then?
9) Davina hosting boffin show. You’re right, it was as if she hadn’t done her homework, or was simply too slow to think on her feet. I felt rather short changed by her, really. The boffins need to be probed in an altogether more skillful manner in order to help them reveal their dark insights. Still a bit grumpy ‘bout it.
10) Trying hard to believe that you think I’m worth more than 25 bits of British money. Stiff upper lip in overdrive, however.
11) You have a latest post? Bollocks. What the hell am I doing snuffling around in the dark here, then?
Okay okay, briefly……..BB1? The best. I prefer to see people getting along. Period. I could just sit and watch people chatting and gelling and finding out about each other for, well, ages really. I think it’s quite lovely.
Teenagers are to blame, no doubts about it, but not just for this, for everything. Ever. Yes, that seems fair to say.
I am sometimes made a wee bit depressed by the sheer inanity of the conversations. There is just no way that I ever knew people who were quite so boring when I was younger. Where is their interest in the world at large? How is it possible that even the “educated” amongst them seem so significantly ill-informed?
Shabnam – boo, hiss. (MD – I find her unbearable, really, properly unbearable)
Ziggy-Siggy – hurrah, swoon. Wrong choice to hook up with someone so soon, though. (update: the new men seem strange – especially the one from Ireland.)
Right, I think that’s everything. I’ll come back to the drunk/negligent/bad driver thing later, if that’s okay? It is a subject that remains fairly toxic for me, although my experiences are thankfully not as bad as yours seem to have been, with the killing of poor Joanne.
Mind you, I think we are both firmly in agreement that willfully negligent drivers are simply the purest of bastards. What more can be said? It feels hopeless. (don't get me started on cyclists and their freakish belief that traffic lights don't apply to them, please)
Mellifluous Dark, I’ve only really made this answer so long in an attempt to annoy you a little bit, and to trample the length of your own efforts into the dust. I am honestly not expecting these things to be responded to. If this makes you feel like an ill-mannered lout (and it reallyshould), then please cut and paste the following and use it as a response (no-one will ever notice and it’ll make me feel like I’m not being ignored entirely – a winning strategy, surely?) Here goes:
"Lord Ponetta of The Prairie, you raise many wonderful points in an engaging and attractive manner. I really sometimes wish that there were more people like you out there, my friend. Sensitive, funny, articulate and friendly – I hope I’m not embarrassing you, Lord Pony, Sir, with this praise? No matter, because it is all true and it needs to be said, and sometimes it’s just nice to be nice.
I do so hope that you will feel able to join me in my latest post upstairs, because I should welcome your presence and we have much to discuss.
With kindest regards,
Mellifluous Dark (Imelda)
It's a plan, Mellifluous Dark, and it might just work. See you somewhere soon, excellent bloggy person that you are.
Kind regards,
Lord Ponetta of the Prairie
Dear Lord Ponetta,
ReplyDeletePlease find a temporary response, as penned by my friend Lord Ponetta, below. A fresh, new one will follow as soon as life and time allow...
"Lord Ponetta of The Prairie, you raise many wonderful points in an engaging and attractive manner. I really sometimes wish that there were more people like you out there, my friend. Sensitive, funny, articulate and friendly – I hope I’m not embarrassing you, Lord Pony, Sir, with this praise? No matter, because it is all true and it needs to be said, and sometimes it’s just nice to be nice.
I do so hope that you will feel able to join me in my latest post upstairs, because I should welcome your presence and we have much to discuss.
With kindest regards,
Mellifluous Dark (Imelda)
I thank thee for thy helpful intervention. I must go and *sob* do some work now. Gah! Have a most splendid Sunday. Ah, the horses are cutting your grass. That is beautiful, Lord P. Beautiful.
hey mell d, i am sneaking in between pony's vast words, just to comment on BB, i am pretty ashamed that i continue to watch such drivel - i saw the ejection of hapless emily on E4 catch-up (my mum has E4, so i indulge while i'm here)...and who are those new men? the irish one is odd as hell, he looks like he's made of plastic physically & emotionally... i was also struck by how similar shabnam & emily look, both kind of attractive, one dark, one fair, and they have similar triangle-shaped heads and very small mouths, & i think they are similar personalities too i.e loathesome x
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