Deep heat

The heat rose from the pavement with the promise of a bright sunny day at 8am. By lunchtime, it was cloudy, muggy and very hot. People sweated as they fumbled to find the air conditioning controls at work. It was a day for headaches and dehydration.

I met two friends (from a newspaper that has employed me for a few years) for a lovely lunch. We sat in the forefront of the open-fronted venue and ate all-day breakfasts and a club sandwich between us. I knew I'd burn it all off at kung fu, so I made an effort to clear my plate.

I'm scared to step on to the bathroom scales. I'd be shocked if I haven't put back on a couple of pounds. But, I do feel good (yes, it's the usual post-kung fu euphoria, and the promise of a dreamy, deep sleep lies ahead). My sleep diaries indicate that I sleep best after a session. I suppose it's not rocket science but it is, for me, something of an epiphany.

I'm terrified to suggest that I may have reached a turning point as far as my sleep issues are concerned. It's a bit too early, really. I remember P saying – warning me – that people reach a stage where they think they are OK and then lapse and decide to have lie-ins and afternoon naps, and the whole brain re-programming thing slides quickly down the drain. I've nodded off on the train back home a couple of times recently... Hmm. Need to watch that.

Actually, being so tired that I'm almost asleep during the day is not a good sign, and doesn't indicate a turnaround. It means I must need more sleep (which I am not allowed to have at the moment). I reckon I'm just getting used to feeling this way.

I want my daytime alertness back. I want it all back. I don't want to have to do the Tufty Club 'look right, look left, look right again' over and over and over again when negotiating a path from the bananas to the bread in Sainsbury's.