Thursday 3 September 2009

The disappeared

It's funny – peculiar, not haha – how people come and go from one's life. I didn't really expect to lose friends, or to have them drift, just because I am expecting a baby. But it has happened. I can try to understand the reasons but part of me is pretty annoyed about their selfishness.

I am not the sort of person to talk about one topic endlessly (i.e. impending motherhood). Never have been. It's insulting that some people seem to be unable to deal with events in my life and I am certainly not going to apologise for getting on with things. OK, so I have less time and far less energy to blog, go out and entertain. But c'est la vie. It doesn't mean I've turned into a bloody cabbage. I've seemingly been struck off a couple of people's friend lists and even blog lists. Not what I expected, but hey, it seems that if I can't go out and drink/stay out late, or X, Y or Z (and then write about it), well, that's that.

Well, bollocks to it. I am heartily sick of being a silent, understanding, doormat-type psychiatrist for those who apply my life events to their own, find some huge relevance and threat, and cannot step back from whatever crappage may be behind their 'distance'. I'm fed-up with sending emails filled with questions and interest in the other person that elicit lukewarm shite. I'm fed-up with my invitations to meet being batted away with "I'm busy/ill/broke" etc. We're all fucking busy, feel sick at times and have no cash. I'm fed-up with making allowances for this and that. Enough.

Things are not all bad on the people front, though. Far from it. My faith in 99.9 per cent of people I care for remains, as ever, strong – stronger, even. And the kindness of someone I'd lost touch with has taken me by surprise. It's a funny old world.


----------------
Listening to: Talk Talk - Life's What You Make It

5 comments:

  1. It works the other way too - I found that when I decided not to have children, when all my friends were, they all just drifted away, assuming I presume that we no longer had a thing in common. People and their perceptions are just strange. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hey Mell, I am still following your blog and was pleased to see your updates appear! (I have cut my actual blog list down to those who post regularly, hope you are not offended by that, I have cut a fair few out, but still follow my favourites!)... Am intrigued by the tea with chillies, have not heard of that, I can't imagine how that would taste. x

    ReplyDelete
  3. People are indeed strange. It's like I've suddenly developed a 'no entry' sign for some people (OK, so bad example, but you know what I mean! ;) )

    The core of a relationship, I think, should be able to weather people's decisions. Ah well...

    ReplyDelete
  4. No worries, NMJ... I saw you there, following! Good to see you here my dear.

    The tea with chillies was lovely – great for winter I reckon. The blend was called 'Obamarama' – I think this is meant to, ahem, reflect that Obama is a black man who is deemed 'hot'!! I can highly recommend it, despite the strange moniker. x

    ReplyDelete
  5. That is the name of the tea?! It is so crass, it is funny. Sounds delish though. Absolutely, the core of a friendship is to weather people's decisions. x

    ReplyDelete